TEST DRIVE 004

[phantasmods]

Hello and welcome to the fourth test drive for Phantasmal Rift!

Test drive threads are assumed to be game canon for accepted characters unless otherwise noted, so don't feel like you'll have to introduce yourself a second time to everyone you meet! As an added bonus, participation in the test drive comes with the chance to earn up to two items of loot for your trouble! Characters who are accepted can earn one item for having a top level, and one for tagging out to someone else's top level! Your SWEET LOOT will be included with your acceptance notice.

Additionally, characters currently in game can earn themselves a piece of bonus loot for the dungeon by tagging people's top-levels on the test drive! Existing characters get their bonus loot along with the rest of their loot at the conclusion of the dungeon.

This test drive takes place in Keystone Reef, a water-influenced Fissure to the northeast of the station. It is home to numerous fish and coral species, as well as a very interesting magical effect...

OPTION ONE: FINNY FUN

Under the water is where you woke up, and under the water is where you might be stuck for a while. The magic is lodged in you and has changed your form -- maybe a little, maybe a lot. Perhaps you only have gills, but you may also have a full set of changes, fins and no feet to speak of. Don't panic, you'll surely be fine if you just keep swimming...

Aside from the strange changes, it's a pretty cool place to be. If you've ever dreamed about scuba diving on a coral reef, the place that you've found yourself is perfect for that (minus the needing to scuba part). Curious fish swim up and then dart away into rock crevices, coral growths, and even down to bury themselves in the layer of sand at the bottom. The water is also fairly shallow, allowing you to surface if you so desire.

Even the sharks are friendly and just want to have as much a look at you as you want to look at them. Don't harass the glowing eels tucked into cracks between the rocks, though, they bite and don't particularly let go.

OPTION TWO: WORLD'S SMALLEST JUNGLE

This must certainly be an oceanside jungle - in spite of the humidity, the smell of salt on the air is strong. Brilliant greens and the occasional bright flowers, accompanied by island birdsong... It could be a nice place to spend an afternoon. There's not even that many bugs that want to drink your blood (though bugs in general are, well, quite plentiful).

Eventually, though, however far you go, you'll reach the beach and be met with the expanse of the ocean - blue, uncaring, and real big. While one side of the little island thankfully has land visible in the distance, the outer side just overlooks a near-endless expanse of blue. If you're a very good swimmer, you could probably make your way to land past the rocks of the reef itself... Otherwise, though, you might be just a bit stuck on your jungle island paradise.

At least until someone brings a boat.

OPTION THREE: SHIPWRECK

Both above and below the waterline are the remains of ships crashed upon the rocks, just waiting to be explored. Even though it has clearly been an incredibly long time, the chunks of wood and metal are still in fairly good condition, and the chance of finding something nice tucked in with them among the rocks is surely tempting to anyone with an adventurous spirit.

The wrecks beneath the waves also grow coral and seaweed, and provide havens for larger fish, dragon eels, and sharks. Those along the rocks above the waterline, on the other hand, provide a home for seabirds of all varieties. Most notable is the hulking shell of a shipping craft in the distance, looking very much modern if ruined by some centuries of exposure...

For right now, though, you'd best contend with the flotsam a bit closer to you, and the wildlife that might not take too kindly to your exploring. Below the waterline, the dragon eels found in a few places don't take kindly to being disturbed; above, you might run afoul of some overprotective seabirds protecting their nests. Maybe even an invisible seagull (normal sized) - how ridiculous would that be?

Comments

[motherfucking_ghost]

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, AND HOW AM I NOT DROWNING RIGHT NOW?

[The yells and heightened reaction of everything makes one of his sparking fingers go off into a mild thunder attack, except we're underwater, so guess what? Now they're both feeling electrified.

To his...credit? It's less deliberate and more a fight or flight reaction that is fight more than flight.] FUCK! FUCK! FUCKING SHIT! THIS IS FUCKING BULLSHIT!

[founderinglight]

Because you have gills, you absolute -

[Zap.

Guess what, that makes the tentacles reflexively cling harder because ow. Izunia flinches hard and turns to stare at the surface with an expression of "why this."

Knowing his luck, someone's catching this on video from behind a rock or something.]

Can we stop being a comedy of errors now before someone needs a potion?

[motherfucking_ghost]

No! You wanna know why? Cuz you're crushing me with your porn tentacles, and also, because welcome to my life! Constant comedy of fucking errors! I didn't mean to do that! Magic is finicky! It's tricky! Sound doesn't move this way under water!

1/2

[founderinglight]

For the love of - just try not to zap us again, I'm going to call Ardyn and if you manage to nuke my phone this is all going to be even more incredibly stupid.

[He wrenches a tentacle off Church's hips with a vague sort of popping sensation, wraps it around the rock before it starts to wander, and pulls a phone out of his Armiger in a flash of blue.]

2/2

[founderinglight]

[HEY BRO your phone is fucking ringing feat good ole elevencrows, who surely would not call you without an actual reason. Surely not.

Hopefully you like have it to hand instead of just fucking leaving it in your Armiger.]

[burninglight]

This had better be vitally important, Izunia, I am dealing with far more than I would like to already.

[motherfucking_ghost]

YOU'RE INCREDIBLY STUPID, FUCKING WATERPROOF PHONE BULLSHIT, WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE FLASHING FUCKING ARMIGER MAGIC LIKE YOU'RE FUCKING NOCTIS, FUCKING BULLSHIT IS WHAT YOU ARE--

[it's ya boi]

[founderinglight]

[It's the boy. Izunia lets him yell a little bit to get the point across, then turns off speakerphone and jams it against the ide of his face.

Of course, as much as he might try to cover the mike, they're still underwater, sound carries, there's probably still some Church yelling in the background. Izunia's own voice is chipper, in the "oh god please help me" kind of way.]

So! We're over in the eastern section, not too far from the sandbars, I figure if he keeps up this level of noise you'll be able to find us perfectly well once you get close.

[burninglight]

...

. . .

I’m on my way.

[motherfucking_ghost]

I'm gonna rip the tentacles right off your body and have sushi tonight! I don't know if octopus counts as sushi and I don't care!

[founderinglight]

[To Church, dryly; ]

That's cannabalism.

[At least the yelling has given him a chance to finally fully distangle and instead curl up on the outcrop of rock.

And back into the phone to Ardyn; ]

Do you want me to stay on the line? He's already panic-zapped us once, I don't really want to risk my phone.

[burninglight]

It’s calamari.

[ARDYN]

Tell him I’m fine and I’ll be there in a minute.

[motherfucking_ghost]

I'm not a squid-dude, I'm a-!

A...fish...maid! Fin person! Finnish! Finnish-American!

[founderinglight]

That's squid, brother dear, not octopus. See you soon.

[He hangs up and immediately puts that phone back into the Armiger before it goes zappy.]

And we're both human outside the range of this magical effect, therefore, it's cannibalism.

[motherfucking_ghost]

This! [He motions to his flappy tail.] This isn't human! This is slap it on the grill and drown it in a lemon-butter sauce!

[founderinglight]

Yes, it's a localized magical distortion, would you rather drown?

[Ardyn please come take your idiot.]

[motherfucking_ghost]

You don't want the answer to that question, faker!

[burninglight]

[I THINK YOU’RE THE FAKE HEDGEHOG AROUND wait wrong game]

[A crossbow bolt stuck into a rock nearby, followed by a warping trail of magenta that crashed directly into Church in a warp-tacklehug. Also an octopus, but this time it was very much the correct twin.]

[founderinglight]

Ugh, I'm going to - oh, there he is.

[JUST GONNA. STAY OUT OF THE WAY OF THIS TANGLE.]

[motherfucking_ghost]

[Unfortunately for everyone, being shot at and tackled by another octopus makes the fear reaction of electricity go off again.

Don't worry, he fucking hates it, too.]

[burninglight]

OW FUCKING HELL LEONARD WHY—

[founderinglight]

[THIS IS STUPID yeah Izunia is still in close enough range to get caught by that.]

- VERY WELL, happy couple reunited, I'm leaving.

[Have electrical play on your own time, guys?]

[motherfucking_ghost]

WHAT IS HAPPENING WHY ARE YOU SHOOTING AT ME DO YOU ALL LOOK THE FUCKING SAME HERE AAAAAUGH-

[burninglight]

STOP SHOCKING ME AND I’LL EXPLAIN, ALSO LESS SHOUTING WOULD BE NICE!!

[motherfucking_ghost]

Let go and maybe I won't shout or shock or do any of those things!

Show me your arm!