TEST DRIVE 006

[phantasmods]

Hello and welcome to Phantasmal Rift's Test Drive Meme!

Test drive threads are assumed to be game canon for accepted characters unless otherwise noted, so don't feel like you'll have to introduce yourself a second time to everyone you meet! As an added bonus, participation in the test drive comes with the chance to earn up to two items of loot for your trouble! Characters who are accepted can earn one item for having a top level, and one for tagging out to someone else's top level! Your SWEET LOOT will be included with your acceptance notice.

Additionally, characters currently in game can earn themselves a piece of bonus loot for the dungeon by tagging people's top-levels on the test drive! Existing characters get their bonus loot along with the rest of their loot at the conclusion of the dungeon.

This test drive takes place in the Telovia Mines, an extremely abandoned magical crystal mine and the town and infrastructure that one supported it. The tunnels are in reasonably good condition and would be reasonably navigable... Except for one thing.

ONE MINOR THING

The magical effects of the Fissure cause those within it to lose something when they arrive - for most people, it's a sense such as touch or hearing, but it's also possible to lose a more esoteric sense (such as your sense of balance or temperature, but NOT things like "sense of morals" or "sense of style"), the ability to speak, or the ability to recognize faces. As a general guideline, whatever characters lose should be non-supernatural in nature, and something they would have taken for granted as a part of their ability to function.

ODDS AND ENDS

Just because the mines are empty of people doesn't mean that they've gone still. While for the most part, the carts full of crystals remain in one place, the huge amount of magic has left more than a few of the miners' abandoned tools still going through their motions. Rusted pickaxes swing at the walls, and dead lanterns swing from the ceiling. Crystals occasionally free themselves from shards of rock to pile into bins, which then empty into already-overflowing mine carts.

As long as you leave them to their jobs, everything will be fine. If you try to stop the tools (and it is the tools themselves, for anyone who might be looking for ghosts) from doing their jobs, they'll chase you down until you leave their general vicinity.

Of course, the eternally working tools don't care much about the structural integrity of the mine tunnels...

THEY ALL PILE UP

...And so, inevitably, there are cave-ins.

Most of them are fairly minor, and you can see them (well, if you can see) enough to just work around them. Some of them are big enough that you're going to have to dig through them first, if you can.

And then there's the handful that block passages entirely. But don't panic! The tunnels are designed around the possibility of this happening - rather than coming to an end, the majority of them loop back around to the main arteries of the mine.

E... ventually...

But you and whoever is stuck with you on this side of the cave-in might be wandering for quite a while before you get there. Hopefully one of you still has a sense of direction, assuming either of you ever had one in the first place.

Comments

[burninglight]

"Ardyn." The correction came a little more gently, with a small half-smile. "I'm not a sage or a king or anything of the sort--there's no need to address me like that."

[seekingsunrise]

Why won't anyone let him address them properly?

"Maybe not any more but you're still-" He sighs, hand coming back up to his face, pausing because now his preferred spot to chew is covered in a bandaid, and then just scratching his fingers through his side burns. "Okay... I'll try."

Ardyn is still more important than him, older and influential and a million things Talcott is not.

[burninglight]

"...Talcott, I'm a chocobo rancher with a husband and more kids than I know what to do with, I'm hardly remarkable these days outside of a highly specific fanbase."

Not technically wrong.

"I never did like standing on ceremony, anyway."

[seekingsunrise]

"Chocobos?" Soft and awestruck and knowing that they were all fictional didn't make it any less sad that chocobos were all but extinct in his world. "Really?"

Which was not the point he was trying to make but it was a better topic of conversation than Talcott's various issues with believing himself to be beneath pretty much everyone else in existence.

[burninglight]

"Of course--a time traveler I know sort of owed me a favor and got my darling girl back from the old days. Then things just sort of snowballed a bit and, well. I have chocobos now."

A shrug, followed by a short pause.

"I...if you want to see, I have a camera with me."

[seekingsunrise]

"I'd really like that." He nods, pleased that he can at least see proof of real chocobos out there somewhere.

"Your girl? What's her name? Wait- I thought you said you went back to Tokyo? You don't have chocobos in Tokyo do you?!"

[burninglight]

"You'd be surprised what you can hide with a little illusion magic." Ardyn waved a hand dismissively, a digital camera appearing in it--not as professional as Prompto's, but it got the job done. After a few seconds' searching he pulled up a picture--Ardyn himself visibly trying to hold back a laugh, while a beautiful black chocobo affectionately headbutted some scruffy loser who seemed entirely at a loss for how to react to this.

"Her name's Philomela. Didn't expect to ever see her again, but space and time are apparently negotiable these days."

[seekingsunrise]

Tal scoots a little closer so he can see without having to take the camera from Ardyn. He knows better than to touch someone's camera. She's beautiful and Tal actually gasps softly when he gets a good look at the picture.

"Oh she's black. I don't think I've ever seen one dyed black before. And she's so sleek and-" He stifles a soft laugh, something that's almost a giggle. "She's gorgeous."

A pause and then he glances back up to Ardyn. "And that... is that your husband?"

[burninglight]

"She's not dyed at all." Ardyn smiled cheerfully, obviously eager for the opportunity to talk about one of his favorite things. "Once upon a time naturally black chocobos were quite common. They could still be found on rare occasions before the Night fell, but they were practically extinct after two millennia."

A brief pause as he tried to brush aside the state of the world for a moment. he didn't question how Talott knew that; likely he'd run into Izunia or someone at some point.

"...Yes. His name's Leonard Church--well, Lucis Caelum, now. Most people sill just call him by his original surname."

[seekingsunrise]

"It's so rare to see Chocobos now, at all, I can't imagine finding a black one." So rare... or maybe just impossible. With them so domesticated before the Night there weren't many that had survived.

"I didn't even know black happened naturally. That is..." He has the stupidest, happiest smile. "That's so cool."

"Church? He's not... actually religious or anything is he?" Please say no. He's not sure he can take any more preaching about The Lord, no matter what Lord that may be.

[burninglight]

"Certainly does. Look--she's got larger wings than the common yellow chocobo. That's a trait shared among black-feathered ones; they can glide for far more substantial distances."

Clearly, he knew his stuff. The other remark got a slight laugh, followed by: "...Talcott, you really think I would marry someone who gave half a fuck about any god, goddess, or pantheon?"

No.

"He's fine. Hates Bahamut almost as much as I do, which is something you're likely to hear from most of my family."

[seekingsunrise]

He laughs as well, sheepish and embarrassed. "Okay fair. And I'm glad you've got a collection of people that hate Bahamut." Everyone should hate Bahamut. Why couldn't they be on of the Final Fantasies where they were just summons or whatever. Gods ugh.

"She seems a little larger in general. Or... is that just because I haven't seen one in person since I was a kid?" He was all of 8 the last time he actually shared space with a real live bird.

[burninglight]

"Oh, plenty. I've got..." He paused for a second to count internally; Church, Junpei, Yuuri, Heart, Arianna- "...five? A Kingsglaive of five, plus one close friend that's not official unless she'd like to be. And then a good deal more back home. They get quite defensive of me particularly with regards to him, though Infernian knows where their blasted sense is for that much."

Ardyn shrugged, then scrutinized the camera for a moment.

"...Now that you mention it, I guess she is. Makes sense--had to be a giant godsdamned bird that could carry Gilgamesh, so maybe they were just larger before a couple thousand years of evolution."

[seekingsunrise]

"Is it weird that it's reassuring to know there are so many people out there that know the truth? Petty bastard." The last bit is muttered under his breath but is no less vehement for it. He's actually really glad the fans all hate Bahamut too but that's not something he can really... explain.

"All the predators were getting larger over the last -what?- century or so, with the Scourge becoming more prevalent again. It's entirely possible they got smaller to be more evasive. There aren't many things that could keep up with a wild bird. Coeurls mostly."

[burninglight]

"Not at all. Every time one of them says they're going to kick him in the dick it brightens my day just a bit."

Ardyn, please.

"Suppose that does make sense. Behemoths were always the worst predator for them I can think of. Midgardsormrs and the like, too--ate their eggs like you wouldn't believe."

[seekingsunrise]

"That's probably why Wiz started breeding them, keeping them safe."

It's hard to say for certain, Talcott hardly remembers Wiz or the chocobo post. It's all from a world that was only ever partially his.

"I wonder if they'll still be around once the Dawn comes." Or are the last few domesticated birds going to be the last of a species?

[burninglight]

"Oh, I don't imagine it'll be hard to get the species to some level of recovery so long as there's a fair handful left. They're smart creatures, I'm sure some managed to keep out of trouble."

[seekingsunrise]

"I hope so. I know there's a fair few species that are... definitely gone, now. I'd hate to see them lost, too."

He laughs a little, offers Ardyn a smile.

"I suppose they'll live on somewhere no matter what though. Since you're raising some."