phantasmemes | TEST DRIVE 006

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!test drive

TEST DRIVE 006

Hello and welcome to Phantasmal Rift's Test Drive Meme!

Test drive threads are assumed to be game canon for accepted characters unless otherwise noted, so don't feel like you'll have to introduce yourself a second time to everyone you meet! As an added bonus, participation in the test drive comes with the chance to earn up to two items of loot for your trouble! Characters who are accepted can earn one item for having a top level, and one for tagging out to someone else's top level! Your SWEET LOOT will be included with your acceptance notice.

Additionally, characters currently in game can earn themselves a piece of bonus loot for the dungeon by tagging people's top-levels on the test drive! Existing characters get their bonus loot along with the rest of their loot at the conclusion of the dungeon.

This test drive takes place in the Telovia Mines, an extremely abandoned magical crystal mine and the town and infrastructure that one supported it. The tunnels are in reasonably good condition and would be reasonably navigable... Except for one thing.

ONE MINOR THING

The magical effects of the Fissure cause those within it to lose something when they arrive - for most people, it's a sense such as touch or hearing, but it's also possible to lose a more esoteric sense (such as your sense of balance or temperature, but NOT things like "sense of morals" or "sense of style"), the ability to speak, or the ability to recognize faces. As a general guideline, whatever characters lose should be non-supernatural in nature, and something they would have taken for granted as a part of their ability to function.

ODDS AND ENDS

Just because the mines are empty of people doesn't mean that they've gone still. While for the most part, the carts full of crystals remain in one place, the huge amount of magic has left more than a few of the miners' abandoned tools still going through their motions. Rusted pickaxes swing at the walls, and dead lanterns swing from the ceiling. Crystals occasionally free themselves from shards of rock to pile into bins, which then empty into already-overflowing mine carts.

As long as you leave them to their jobs, everything will be fine. If you try to stop the tools (and it is the tools themselves, for anyone who might be looking for ghosts) from doing their jobs, they'll chase you down until you leave their general vicinity.

Of course, the eternally working tools don't care much about the structural integrity of the mine tunnels...

THEY ALL PILE UP

...And so, inevitably, there are cave-ins.

Most of them are fairly minor, and you can see them (well, if you can see) enough to just work around them. Some of them are big enough that you're going to have to dig through them first, if you can.

And then there's the handful that block passages entirely. But don't panic! The tunnels are designed around the possibility of this happening - rather than coming to an end, the majority of them loop back around to the main arteries of the mine.

E... ventually...

But you and whoever is stuck with you on this side of the cave-in might be wandering for quite a while before you get there. Hopefully one of you still has a sense of direction, assuming either of you ever had one in the first place.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"Can't blame him for wanting to get away from the Astrals... or at least Bahamut." It comes out more a curse than a name, heavy with disdain. He'd been firmly on the Fuck Bahamut side of things even before finding out they were fictional. Why did they get the version of Bahamut that's an asshole?

"Portland... As in Oregon?" Because of course one of he many books he'd devoured immediately upon getting back to the facility was geography.

"I... well I know who you are because I've been helping Ignis with his research for the last 4 years. Up until about 11 weeks ago. I got... uh... drawn into a version of Earth, part of a ritual to appease an ancient god by an organization that had no idea what they were messing with. It was... pretty miserable but we managed to convince them to stop the ritual and now we're helping make sure things never get that bad again. Most of us anyway." And as he speaks he reaches up to tug the baseball cap he's wearing off, holding it out to Ardyn so he can see the SCP logo.

"I've been researching as much as I can about that version of Earth, especially America since that's where we we're stationed. And the worlds the rest of us came from."

"Wait, wait--slow down." Because wow, that sure was a lot to process. "I didn't even know there was anything left to research about me, first of all."

Priorities.

"Secondly, what kind of ritual are you talking about, because if the word 'murdergame' comes out of your mouth, I'm going to destroy this cave-in with the power of my resulting anger and nothing else. Third, fuck the Draconian. That's not really relevant, I just like saying it."

"That's always relevant." Seriously, fuck the Draconian.

"There wasn't much, that's for sure." But they'd been able to find enough to piece together the general idea of the story. So much of it contradicted itself though the details were always very muddled.

"As for what happened at camp... It was supposed to look like a summer camp but they pulled all the kids from different worlds so they could... try to force us to kill each other for 8 weeks. 2 sacrifices a week with a mass killing at the end. Of course they didn't tell us they planned to murder the survivors. Or make one of us do it." So he's not saying word 'murdergame' but yeah, that's definitely what was going on. "Messing with our heads and trying to drive us insane so we'd-"

He cuts off, swallowing hard, trying to push down the memory of Chloe's face, shattered and slick with blood and bone and so much worse under his hands. Boa's face crumpling under so much stone. It takes a long moment for him to even realize he's breathing hard and fast, eyes clenched shut.

"S-sorry..." Most of the time his memory is a blessing. So many things he can remember with so little effort, it's been invaluable for Ignis. But there are times, especially recently, where it's more a curse than a blessing. Talcott takes a moment, breathing out slowly, forcing himself to regulate his breathing, fingers curling tight around his dog tags. "They wanted everyone that died to be as frightened as humanly possible so they could use our fear to feed the God they were keeping contained. It's why they used children, too."

...Hm. No. Nope, doesn't like that. Ardyn took a slow breath, quickly stomping out his own rush of anger and trying to focus on Talcott; one thing at a time, don't lose your temper, deep breaths--

"Fucking godsdamned abject eldritch BULLSHIT-"

...He's trying. Ardyn quickly cut himself off again, pressing a hand to his eyes and taking another slow breath.

"Sorry. Sorry, I just-..." He pinched the bridge of his nose, dropping his hands after a moment. "...Yeah. Ours wasn't meant to end in a complete slaughter, but I've gone through two seasons of shit like that billed as entertainment. Yours--are you and the others alright?"

He huffs a breath, a dark humorless almost laugh.

"Can anyone be okay after that?" A sigh and he scrubs a hand over his face, scratching at his sideburns, trying to settle himself and push the memories back where they belong, locked away in his mind. "But everyone that wanted to leave was allowed to... As long as we stayed with Foundation."

Which isn't really the same as being able to leave. "The only way to... maybe go home is to die. Again." And he's not about to test that theory any time soon. Not that he has any real reason to want to return to Eos.

"Hopefully things ended a little better for your group?"

Ardyn took another slow breath, dropping to sit on the ground with his back to the debris blocking the path. In, out, one thing at a time. The general injustice of not even being allowed to leave could be addressed later, once he'd focused on the question at hand and put together an answer.

"Everyone we lost-...they were uploaded into virtual reality, so it was simple enough to restore. Once the executive producer of the show was arrested and things settled down after the resulting scandal, we largely went our separate ways--though we do check in on one another now and again."

He at least sounded calmer now--annoyed, at worst.

"My family and I went to one world's Tokyo--it's basically the same as Insomnia, truth be told. We'd been there for a couple months when we ended up here."

"Tokyo..." How many times had he written that when he was collecting the list of people's next of kin? "I want to see Tokyo. So many of us were from there. But getting leave to go off base is hard enough, leaving the country is... not going to happen at our rank." A shrug and... he actually moves over to sit down near Ardyn, not necessarily dropping his guard completely but definitely easing his paranoia closer down to his usual levels.

"I've seen videos though. I... don't remember Insomnia very well, it's been so long." He was so young when the city fell and honestly his grandpa had been so busy he rarely got to leave the estate. Driving through when they escaped with Iris had been quite the sight. "Now I want to go even more if it's that much like Insomnia."

"But we're stuck in Michigan, it's in the Mid-Western region of the United States."

"I'm not too familiar with the finer specifics of Earth's geography, I have to confess." He'd only heard about most other places secondhand, and all in all he'd only even lived on Earth for a couple months.

But he shook his head and brushed the specifics aside for a moment, restlessly running a hand through his hair.

"Noctis and Lunafreya went to Portland. Prompto went back to his timeline on Eos with a girl named Lucina--she'll look after him. And I took off with a patchwork Kingsglaive in the opposite direction as fast as I could."

"I... started studying as soon as we got out of camp. We need to be able to blend in so I've been catching up on Earth history, geography, politics, anything I can get my hands on." See this is one of the bonuses to the eidetic memory. It's only been a few weeks but he's got a decent grasp on the basics. (Probably more than the average American teen, really)

"They, his Majesty and Lady Lunafreya, got... to be together in the end?" It's so soft and hopeful and for a moment so painfully childish. He just wants to believe that somewhere they got to have a happy ending.

"I think if I studied a damn thing, my head might explode. Word of advice: don't put two thousand years of memory in a human body. If I weren't already insane, I'd probably have gone crazy by now."

Ardyn rolled his eyes, laughing under his breath.

"...They're alright, yes. Lady Lunafreya and I don't speak for rather obvious reasons, but Noctis and I have more or less settled things. So I think I know enough to tell you they're doing well."

For as awful and chaotic as everything has been over the last few months this moment, the knowledge that Noctis is okay and safe and happy with Lunafreya somewhere, in some world... that makes it all worthwhile.

Even knowing that it's all going to get some magical fix in the next year or two thanks to the developers underplanning.

"I'm glad... that they're doing well not that-" He gestures vaguely at Ardyn himself, smile fading. "Knowledge or not I think... being in that kind of situation makes everyone a little crazy."

Or a lot in his case.

"Oh, it's alright. I think we can agree I've been out of my damned mind since before the current calendar went into effect. But even after a year I still don't know how humans can stand living like this...all fragile and with such a limited ability for memory retention. I get headaches now, what the fuck is that?"

Your immortal Accursed, ladies and gentlemen.

"I can't help you on the memory retention side of things, I've never had that problem." Nope, everything just lives in his brain in perfect clarity. It's a little unsettling to most people.

"Headaches are awful though and... I'm not entirely sure how fragile I am anymore? But it is definitely enough to make you paranoid." Ardyn was forthcoming about his murdery experiences Tal would do the same. Even if there's a good chance that consideration might get him killed.

"At this point, I think anyone stuck in a situation like that doesn't come out of it the same way physically or otherwise."

3D printed bodies with nanites, not-quite-dead whatever Akechi was, there really was a range of nonsense at this point.

"Ah... new bodies for your dead as well then?" Clearly not for the living, right? Why would the living need new bodies.

Unless something like what happened to Ren happened to one of them.

"More like new ones for those of us that either didn't have a corporeal form, were just overrun with a contagious disease, or both."

A slight wave to illustrate the point. Yep, whole new human body.

Overrun with disease. Ah...

Talcott nods, though. It does make sense. A new body would be the only way to save him from the Scourge. "Convenient at least?" He looks a little apologetic even as he says it.

"Do I want to know what you owe them for replacing your body?"

"Owe them? Absolutely fucking nothing--hell, after the whole legal proceedings settled down I'm basically worth the empire's military budget several dozen times over."

Ardyn laughed, somewhere between bitter and actually amused.

"No, you see, once the whole show was exposed as not actually being scripted, the executive producer and indeed the entire network were in all kinds of trouble. It turns out it is very illegal to kidnap people from across universes and force them to kill one another because you're a godsdamned lunatic whose entire race doesn't comprehend the idea of creativity."

"O-oh." He just kind of blinks in surprise at that. "I suppose... at least you got some compensation for it all?"

He got a gilded cage. And a truck, the truck is very important. Even if he hasn't really gotten it working yet.

"...What about you? How'd things turn out once yours was over and done with?"

"The only way those of us that died even had a chance of making it out is because someone working for the organization running things had... bodies on hand. They're called gigai, blank slates essentially that adapt to fit the soul placed in them." He raises his hand, brushes his fingers along the scar carved into his cheek. "What you expect to see is what you get."

And as his hand falls away he adjusts his scarf a little, fluffing it just so even though he knows it's covering anything questionable.

"We owed them. For getting us bodies, for giving us a chance. We were never meant to exist in that world, either so we couldn't just go off and live on our own. The only way we might be able to go home is if we died. But even Ichigo couldn't guarantee that, all he could say for certain was that our souls no longer existed in that world. Some people chose to let their souls be released, I can only hope they went home." He sighs a little, tugs the baseball cap he's wearing off and holds it out to Ardyn, the Foundation logo embroidered on the front.

"So now we work for them... low ranking agents. Canon fodder, really. But maybe with time we can make a difference. It's all we can hope for. The only option was to make a deal with the devil or let a bunch of kids die for a principal. Some of them as young as eleven."

Ardyn frowned sharply, out of disapproval at the general situation instead of Talcott specifically.

"Are you alright with that?" Whatever reason it was that led him to ask, it sounded entirely serious.

"Because if I make one phone call once I get back home, I can get Intergal's technology no questions asked. 3D printing, dimension hopping, the whole thing. Wouldn't be hard to get you and your friends a third option."

Why he was offering that practically offhand to someone he'd more or less just met was anyone's guess, but Ardyn looked and sounded genuinely sincere.

It's a serious offer, he can tell that much, so he does put some thought into it, one hand coming up to rest thoughtfully against his chin... and he doesn't even notice when 'thoughtful' turns into destructive but he starts chewing at his cuticles pretty quickly. Clearly a deeply ingrained habit judging from the wreckage of his fingertips.

"I don't know... a lot of us older kids wanted... we wanted to make a difference." And the world they'd been in was overrun with SCPs that were terrifying and dangerous. Like 106 and what had happened to poor Shiro. "But given the opportunity to freely travel between worlds I know a lot of them would want to go home."

Lance could go home, see his friends again, reconnect with Blue... maybe he'd even let Tal go with him still, see space and and help the other Paladins and maybe then he wouldn't screw everything up so much and there was so much he could learn. Not just cars and trucks and airships but space ships and maybe it wouldn't matter that he'd fucked everything up so much because he could do something useful and-

He blinks up at Ardyn, refocuses on what he's supposed to be talking about, not even noticing the shock that brought him back as blood slowly begins to surface along the side of his thumb. "I think a lot of the younger kids would rather go back... and some of them that have... purposes but it's... complicated."

"I don't think I'd want to go back to Eos, though. I miss Iris and everyone but... I can actually maybe change things back in Michigan, do something to help." going back to Eos would mean going back to being a useless kid again.

"Careful." It was a gentle admonishment, Ardyn looking through the Armiger for only a moment before coming up with a bandage he held out to Talcott. For all the curatives he had, he'd still kept a fair bit of the infirmary just in case.

"I just mean...look, it's really none of my business, but it sounds like you and the other kids were handed an unfair choice right out of a miserable situation. And maybe I'm sticking myself where I don't really belong, but I just don't like the idea of a group of children running around doing gods know what because they aren't allowed any other option. I'm not saying 'run off back home', just...you know, it's better to have the choice to do what you want with your life."

And weren't choice and free will just insane concepts.

"...Consider it my thanks. For...finding something no one else ever could."

Talcott just stares blankly at the offered bandaid for a long moment, confused. He reaches for it, takes it uncertainly and it isn't until he sees the bright smudge of blood on the paper wrapper that he even realizes he's bleeding.

"You're probably right." And for one crazy moment he just stares down at his thumb, fighting down the urge to keep going, keep peeling back the skin to make sure it's blood and flesh underneath, not stone. His breath comes out harsh and shaky, eyes squeezed shut for a moment.

His hands are shaking by the time he opens his eyes again, motions jerky and rough, wiping the blood away on his pants and ripping open the band-aid, wrapping it too tight, hiding the wound and whatever other godawful things might be underneath. "How many people do you know that had choices?"

Ardyn you didn't have a choice. They were all puppets of fate and story writers and- He shakes his head, trying to throw off the spiral of his thoughts, the voice in his head sounding too much like Sol for a moment there, rage and crashing stone.

"I'm sorry I'm-" Being negative, being too hard again, not looking at the bright side. Gods, what would Lance think of him, falling into the same old thought patterns so soon after finding himself somewhere new, somewhere away from the Foundation. "I didn't do anything to deserve your gratitude."

There, one thing he could be certain of that wasn't a byproduct of going crazy.

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CW: murder trauma/gore

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CW: minor self harm

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